At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinking I could never teach through Canvas all the time
But then I spent so many nights reading the help docs for so long
And I grew strong
And I learned how to get along

And so I’m back
The students are gone
As all my colleagues try to figure out how they’re gonna get along
I should have kept up with the tech, not skipped that class on course design
If I’d have known for just one second I’d be teaching all-online
Go on now, go, leave me alone
I’ve got to figure out
Just how to lecture using Panopto
You gave me two days to adjust, to move everything online
Did you think I'd crumble
Did you think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no, not I, I will survive
Oh, as long as I know how to Zoom, I know I'll be alive
Oh, my students still will learn
And my paychecks I will earn, and I'll survive
I will survive, hey, hey

It took all the strength I had not to lay down and die
Kept trying hard to mend the pieces of my syllabi
And I spent oh so many nights just feeling sorry for myself
I used to cry
But now I hold my head up high and you’ll see me
Teaching on Zoom
But just don’t cough into the mike or every eye will be on you
I can’t hear you, you’re on mute, your camera’s black, are you still there?
We’ve got some glitches to work out, but I know my grading scheme is fair
Oh now, go, walk out the door
Trying to get this lecture done
And I’m already on take four
Now the network has gone down, and I’m all out of wine
Do you think I’ll crumble
Do you think I’ll lay down and die?

Oh no, not I, I will survive
Oh, as long as I know how to Zoom, I know I’ll be alive
Oh, my students still will learn
And my paychecks I will earn and I’ll survive
I will survive, Hey hey